Should You Marry Before 30's?

 

by Lanilane Ocbina

 
It is really up to you and of course, to God's timing...

Whom Should You Marry?

I do not really want to lead you to a pursuit to solve that puzzle. Getting married not actually the main thing in life. I do not want you to live a life that I once experienced. That was when my prayer was the same thing on a daily basis. “Who’s it gonna be Lord?”. I ask Him day after day after day. But there was no response. I thought, when He is silent, He is surely thinking about something wonderful. So I just have to wait in Him.

 

Your pursuit should be remaining in God’s will.

Your pursuit should be remaining in God’s will. I am sure that the best partner for you and me will be someone whom God approves. He (or she if you are a man) may be someone whom you meet in the missionfield. May not be the perfect person who qualifies with your standards but you will just feel the Lord’s blessing upon you and that person, hearing Him say to you, “Yes, that’s it, go for it!”.

 

Of course it would not just be that still small voice that you will hear. You will sense that everything seems to be in its perfect place and that the Holy Spirit has just obviously orchestrated everything to let you know that He is in favor of you to be with this last person whom you will love on earth (romantically speaking).

What Are The Signs?

I would say that it is not always like Gideon’s fleece sign scenario. Signs actually vary. God surely won’t run out of ways to communicate His approval or disapproval of things. But one thing’s for sure, it is the right relationship if you are drawn closer to God and that person too. You cannot be with someone and see yourself being made distant from God.

To find God’s answers, you are to maintain your relationship with Him by a healthy consistent communication through prayers, reading His Word, and being sensitive with people, circumstances, and yourself through the help of the Holy Spirit.

It is really up to you and the Lord. You are the one communicating to God. I believe there are no particular patterns. We cannot limit God. He can give as many kinds of signs as He would. As I said, He will never run out of it. The question is, are you communicating to Him regularly and by the power of His Spirit, sensing His signals.

On the other note, I would say, it is always best to obey the Lord first. Seek Him first and everything shall be added unto you. Signs will be given unto you if you remain obedient to Him. Doing so, you will know God more and get more familiar with His voice.

At this point, surely you will hear a lot of voices and you can get confused. Please do not make yourself fall into the many traps. Seek God. Establish a deeper relationship with Him. That way, you will understand His plan in your life as divine patterns gradually unfold before your eyes.

Wait But Keep Assessing

I kept on saying wait for God’s timing because the right person will just come. That is true but I did not mean for you to just wait and marry when that person comes. Perhaps, the person already came in but you’ve missed it!

In this regard, I want to appeal to you to use the brain that the Lord has blessed you. Assess those who come. You meet a lot of men (if you’re a woman) or lots of women (if you’re a man) and these chances are actually given for you to know the different qualities of the opposite sex. You can even see patterns to teach you about their behaviors and I tell you, most of the time you will be amazed!

I am telling you to make friends but do not flirt okay?

In this freedom stage, I got to have male friends, younger and older ones. I was given the chance to understand their differences and similarities. There are these ones who are extra sweet who will let you feel special even though their intention is just friendship. There are ones who are stiff but actually admiring you secretly. There were times that I even get the same exact message from different men through my phone and facebook, all popping out at the same time! Some would say “go eat your breakfast”, “how are you, I miss you”, “I dreamt about you”, and so forth. Believe it or not, most men have the same lines! (if you are a man reading this, sorry for spilling the beans) And over the years, I have learned not to easily get hooked and fall for anyone because some are just naturally sweet friends. You don’t even know that some of them send it to more than one recipients. You may think they have an intention of courting you but they actually have no plan at all. For these, I usually rest my case and maintain friendship with them unless I get a message from the Lord that this particular person is the one whom He has prepared for me. And in the first place, the guy should also declare his intention himself otherwise it will go nowhere. 

If you are a man and you want to know which woman it is, I guess you need to stop for a while and ask yourself these questions : Are you ready? Do you have work? Are you responsible? Do you have the sense of leadership needed for a future head of the family? And ultimately, is your relationship with the Lord firm and unshaken? If you have positive answers for these, then let’s go back and answer that “who” question.  *

*Adam was in God’s presence, instructed to cultivate the ground and work, took care of all other creations, before he finally got Eve in his life.

I pray that the Lord will guide you and give you wisdom and then protect you from any temptations of falling for the wrong person. May our Almighty Father, in the name of Jesus Christ, be your fortress and refuge in this time of confusion. Amen.

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